A need to know

I’m struggling with questions. Why do I have so few questions? It makes me wonder am I just simple. It isn’t that I don’t care. I read the debates and I know I have an opinion. I also am keenly aware when I don’t have answers for some of the questions and sadly I’m alright with this.
I feel like I am on a “need to know” basis with God. When I need to know….then he fills me in. The rest of the time I just try and live out what I already know. I don’t think it is wrong to question. I actually think it can spur on great discussions and sharpen our beliefs. I admire those who can ask the cutting edge questions. I just realize- I don’t have that in me. I’m not cutting edge material. (At least not on the internet.) I like the debates and discussions but I think one thing that holds me back is not having the conversations face to face. I am uneasy when I can not see the whole language of a person (words and body language) being spoken before me. The other reason is my fear of just not being smart enough or well read enough to participate. Sad, I know…but this is true and holds me back.

I also am overwhelmed with the amount of need in our world for God to intervene in and through us in tangible ways…

Human trafficking
The blasphemy site (which I just learned about from Rob Reardon’s site)
The links on the blasphemy site- They make me cringe!
The apathy and self centeredness of society
The list goes on and on.
I am very aware of these things and yet sit here with absolutely no idea of how to even begin to turn the tide. My game plan….seems weak at best. I’m trying to live out Christ where I am. This isn’t a self- righteous statement…I actually feel like living out Christ where I am doesn’t address any of these needs…at least not in a tide changing way. But it is all I can do at the moment so it is what I do. Again…I guess it is a need to know kind of thing. When the Lord want me to do something more….He will tell me and give me creative ways to participate. Until then, I just do what I already know to do.

In my life recently, God has poured out upon me a real sense of how he has blessed me. To tell you the truth he has gone out of his way to romance me. I am undeserving to say the least and yet I know it is my responsibility to receive this from him wholeheartedly. This isn’t as easy as it should be. This I question! Go figure!?
I have also been made aware recently of areas where I may have failed him and as Moses….. I have been given permission to look at the “promise land” from a distance but not be there. My heart breaks over this one and I’m not even sure where I went wrong. Now for this situation, I have many questions for the Lord but they are just between us.
Any questions??